Of course with infertility there are a great number of fears. The what ifs of having something wrong with you or your husband, or if you'll ever get pregnant or if you're less of a woman because your body isn't working out quite right.
Then there are the fears of repeat miscarriage, which are somewhat the same as infertility, although there are some very different, very scary fears there as well.
So after over 8 weeks of pregnancy, I have discovered new fears, beyond miscarriage. Very unexpected fears. Fears that I really never gave ANY thought to, and are now just creeping up since this pregnancy dream seems to be coming to fruition:
1 - I have no fucking clue what to do with a newborn.
2 - All I own is a crib and a few baby clothes.
3 - How in the world can we afford a baby?
I realize I should have given thought to these fears a long time ago, but I was so focused on actually getting myself knocked up that I failed to see the forest through the trees. I guess since I wasn't sure it would ever happen, I didn't worry needlessly about other fears.
Although come to think of it, that is so not like me. Hmm. Weird.
Firstly, congrats on 8 weeks! I hope everything continues to go well. My experience with post-miscarriage worries is that they are unavoidable but hopefully every day closer you get to the mysterious newborn's arrival they may seem more manageable?
ReplyDeleteAnd I don't think anyone knows what to do with a newborn unless they work with them or have had one wihin the last 18 months - I'm sure it will all come back to you!
I'll second the congrats on 8 weeks! Yay!
ReplyDeleteThat's what baby showers are for, to get you most of the stuff you need.
I think most infertiles have lost focus of the actual taking-care-of-baby part, b/c we wrestle so long with the unachievable dream. I wonder sometimes if I really do want kids right now or if it's just become a goal I can't achieve and that's why I focus on it.
(hugs) Things are going to work out great!
Congrats on 8wks! That's awesome :) Hope things continue to go well... the other worries, well there will be time for all that. One day at a time!
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