Update

So it turns out when your life is super uneventful, you run out of things to blog about. So here are some of the non-events in my life.

- Well I guess being pregnant IS a big event, but there's just nothing new to report. We are set to have a gender check ultrasound on April 16th. This is an "extra" ultrasound that I have to pay for just because I am too impatient to wait for the regular insurance covered ultrasound 3 weeks later. My husband and I have toyed with the idea of waiting until the birth to find out but me thinks my impatience will win.

- My pal Kelly blogged about how she is obsessed with Dance Moms. It's this wretched show about these crazy moms who subject their children to an even crazier dance teacher. It's like Toddlers & Tiaras on crack. It's the WORST. Yet rest assured Kelly, I DVR it every week and get sad when the hour is up. What is wrong with us?

- Does anyone else check their bank balance and automatically think, " The bank must have made a mistake.". And you think this because you have no money and you have no clue why. This happens to me regularly and let me just tell you. The bank has NEVER made a mistake. Like ever. Never ever. I just somehow spend all the money and don't realize it.

Happy Birthday!

One year ago today I brought my sweet baby into this world. He brings so much love, joy and laughter to my life and I'm so grateful I get to be his mom.

The Weaning Project

Not to be confused with the weenie project you weirdos.

So yeah, I have officially weaned. I wasn't going to be in a hurry but I noticed L was having quite a few less wet diapers and seemed really hungry a lot. So I used my large, insanely smart brain to deduce that he wasn't getting enough breast milk. I started giving him 1 or 2 cows milk bottles a day just to introduce it to his system. He seemed to handle it just fine so I quickly increased him to several bottles a day.

He still dive bombs my boobs and wants to nurse especially when he's tired. It makes me sad to turn him down but the few times I have given in* I can tell nothing is coming out. I don't want him to rely on me as a human pacifier so I'm trying to just give him a bottle every time. His tummy is adjusting but we are definitely having some weird shit going on in the diaper department.

Anyway the bottom line is that it's nice to have my freedom back. Oh yeah and my tits.


* I typed this line wrong on accident and my phone auto corrected to "I have HIV." WTF?

I'm so Zen

I wonder how many blog posts start with "I was watching Dr. Phil today and..."

Anyway, I was watching Dr. Phil today and he said something that really hit me hard. It was basically that when you get angry, physiological changes take place in your body that make you unhealthy. I already know this and truly believe it but it was something I just needed to hear today. I think women especially are at risk for heart disease and cancer because we keep anger inside us and it builds into a bitter ball that eventually leads to disease. Or maybe just I do that. I'm a Scorpio after all.

Of course I can't get any more specific about this nugget of wisdom except to say that I am done with anger and working toward a plan that brings peace to me and ultimately, happiness.

Um Hi

How have I not mentioned that several fucking MONTHS ago I told the hubs about the blog? I seriously keep thinking I need to blog about it but then promptly forget. So yeah. Told him. He was mad. But mostly he was just hurt that I kept a secret for so long. He actually really enjoys my writing and is always telling me I should write a book about pregnancy. I guess he thinks my vagina stories or the fact that I pee myself would make for some good reading material. I offered to send him a link to the blog so he could read it and he didn't want it. So apparently he doesn't need to hear about my pee problems AND read about them too. Hmm weird. I've discussed this at length with several friends and how if the situation were reversed I would, OF COURSE, be poring over every word he wrote. I think E said it best when she claimed she would print each blog entry out and go over it with a highlighter. But alas, he feels it would be an invasion of my privacy to read it so he doesn't. He also asked me not to talk about him on here. Oops.

So next, I am currently weaning L. I've started giving him one or two cow's milk bottles a day just to introduce it to his system. He does pretty well with it but when he's tired, all he wants is the boob. I should really take a video of him when he sees me whip it out. He starts laughing and gets all excited and sometimes even claps. It is adorable and I will miss it but my body is struggling to keep up right now and I feel like he's not getting enough. I might try to hang on to the night feedings because they are so damn convenient, but I'm not sure if the ol' milkers are going to go along with that plan.

And finally, how did my baby get to be almost 1 already?

Back (Already)

So it's like I just needed to complain a little on my blog and the morning sickness gods would listen. The fog seems to be lifting and I'm actually starting to feel GOOD! Yeah!!!!

I still have the sickness some of the day but yesterday I actually said the words, "It's so nice out and I feel so good I actually want to go for a run!" Of course, I DIDN'T actually go for a run but that is beside the point. (For the record, I did go for a walk to pick my son up from school. See exercise.)

Also I'm happy to report that my cravings this pregnancy revolve around fruit. In the last 4 days I've eaten a whole pineapple, kiwis, 3 containers of strawberries, oranges and bananas. Not 1 vegetable has touched my lips but at least I'm not eating an endless supply of macaroni and cheese and pancakes. Of course L is helping me eat all this fruit and it's awesome. I'm glad he loves it as much as I do.

So now that pregnancy update is out of the way. Here's a story about my vagina.

Just kidding. My vagina has no stories to tell.

Absent

I don't have a lot to say. Well that is, I don't have a lot of positive things to say. So I haven't been saying anything.

I feel shitty all day. Every. Day. I know nobody wants to hear about that but it's all I really have going on. Hubs is back to working all day and night and with that plus the sickness, things aren't great there. There are some days I just want to throw my hands in the air and just be roommates because it seems like that would be easier.

I know that's not true but some days just kick me in the balls. Except you know, I don't have balls. Aw fuck, even my analogy doesn't work.

Anyway, now you know why I'm not writing. My life is uneventful and vomity. Will return when my grouchy side subsides again...