Confession #1 - I am a horrible blog friend. I admit it. I apologize for it. I swear I do read everything you dudes write but I cannot for the life of me get my commenting shit to work. And I'm too lazy/tired to figure out the problem. Feel free to not comment on my blog if you are offended at my lack of commenting. (This is a lie. Please keep commenting. I swear I'll fix it soon and I need you to validate me. (Just kidding. Sort of.)) It's not that I'm that lazy really, it's just that I'm a working mom now too AND I bring my baby to work with me so I seriously am sitting here with him on my lap while typing this and simultaneously catching his toys as they fall off my desk. God forbid he drops them on the floor and I have to sanitize them. Not to mention every time someone walks past my office I have to click on something else so it looks like I'm doing some actual work.
Confession #2 - I never sanitize anything.
Confession #3 - Sometimes I hold my baby's butt up to my nose and sniff it to check for smelly diapers. I think this might be somewhat normal though right? The sniff test? I don't ever sniff anybody else's butt though.
Confession #4 - I'm totally snoopy. I've been fully busted going through my husband's phone. I discovered our top secret honeymoon plans by snooping through the computer. I dig through drawers and receipts all the time. I am a rubber neck at car accidents and I'm always down for a good gossip sesh. I'm working on it, but me = nosey.
Confession #5 - When I'm alone, I sometimes chew as noisily as I want to. Like mouth wide open, nom nom nom, lips smacking and everything. One day I did that in front of the Hubs and told him I do that when I'm alone sometimes and he thought it was just about the most repulsive thing he'd ever seen. To be fair though, he has some weird issues with chewing with your mouth open. I decided maybe that's one I should keep to myself for a few more years.
Confession #6 - I just did spell check and found that I had spelled "confession" incorrectly 3 times in this post. That's not even the biggest word here.
I am sooooo nosey. Not only that, but I don't even care that I'm nosey. I like having people think that I'm in the know and I won't apologize for it! :)
ReplyDeleteAre we not supposed to sniff other peoples butts??
I really love this post.... its so honest and adorable. Makes me wanna be a fly on your wall for half a day.
ReplyDeleteMy confession: I don't know you, but I stalk you via the internet because your writing cracks me up. (I found you via my friend Natalie). How's that for nosey!
ReplyDeleteAnd butt sniffing is totally normal, and I don't sanitize anything either. Not even the gross-ish things that I really should sanitize. It builds up their immune system, or so I tell myself!
I don't always comment (because I'm no where near as witty as you...and because I'm lazy) but yours is one of my most fav blogs!!
ReplyDeleteI sniff my kid's butt & don't sanitize anything & am glad I'm not alone :)
I was going to not comment, but then you wouldn't have known that I read this and DELIBERATELY not commented, so instead, I'm commenting about not commenting.
ReplyDeleteConsider yourself uncommented.
While reading #1, I thought "she sanitizes everything? that surprises me" -- and then i read #2, laughed, and felt very smart.
ReplyDeletefigure out your damn comment issues girlie. did you delete all of the internet cache/cookies/etc?
Gotta admit I don't sniff people's asses at the moment, though I'm guessing that will change soon enough. :)
I'm with you on 1, 2, 3, and 4. But 5? That's just gross ;)
ReplyDelete