Tidbits

I don't really have a coherent post floating around in my head right now, so I thought I'd make a list of things that have gone on over the past few days and also some things that have come in and out of my head frequently lately.  This might give you an idea of how confusing it is to be me.

- My air conditioner went out on Saturday.  Anyone who knows me IRL or on FB is probably sick to death of hearing about this but I don't give a fuck.  It has been over 100 degrees in my neck of the woods for the past few days, and I am also 7 months pregnant.  7 months pregnant = hot = fat = sweaty.  Like ridiculously hot, fat and sweaty even when the AC is on.  So here I am, at home, trying to figure out how to stay cool and all I can do is just go to my parents' house.  Now my parents are super awesome, but spending several days in a row with them makes them seem less awesome.  Nuff said.  Then when the sun went down, we'd come home and open all doors and windows and turn on fans and hope that we didn't pass out.  The short end to this excruciating story is that it is sortof fixed and my house is now at least decent enough to stay home in.

-  I do like a clean house.  I have daily chore lists and projects.  Bugs has chores too.  Now I'd like to say that my house is spotless all the time, but it sure the fuck isn't.  I've given this a lot of thought because I feel like I clean constantly and don't understand why I always see the mess.  The reality is that there are a fuck load of people that live in this house and I am pretty much the only person concerned with its state of cleanliness.  This is why I have chosen to give up on cleaning bathtubs and dusting.  Well, ok, I clean the one bathtub that my baby actually bathes in, but all the other tubs and showers can go straight to hell.  And the tub that the baby bathes in?  Well it gets cleaned every time he takes a dump in it.  Which realistically is kindof a lot so that thing does get cleaned.  Dusting?  OMG.  I fucking hate it and find it inconvenient and useless.  You can sometimes find me using an old sock to sweep up noticeable dust.  But only when company is coming over.

- I live in BFE, so I don't get company that often = dusty house.

- This morning I was thinking about all the little things I do.  You know, the ones that nobody really notices but if you were gone then someone would go to wash their hands and be like, "Oh we're out of soap in here. How did the soap ever get filled before?"  I swear my husband just thinks we are clean people and doesn't fully understand that I am actually working my ass off daily to look like we are clean people.  Minus the dust and the conditioner stained shower walls.  Anyway, I feel as if I were to run away that my children would never have hair or finger nail trimmings, their clothes would all be too small and non-matchy, nobody would have toilet paper ever, and hand washing, tooth brushing and bedtime wouldn't exist.

- I am 29 weeks pregnant today.  L was born at 36w6d, so if this little gal comes early as well, that means I could very well have a baby soon.  Like soon soon.  This epiphany hit me yesterday like a ton of bricks and now I am in desperation mode trying to figure out some key things, like where the fuck is she going to sleep? And where will I put her numerous outfits?  Obviously some furniture shopping is in order.

- When I am typing a post/letter/email, I fully intend to do spell check when I am finished with the project.  But for some reason, if I spell something incorrectly, I just cannot ignore that stupid red squiggly line and I have to fix the spelling error immediately.

- I am totally off my anti-anxiety meds now and have been for a few weeks.  Most days are really good and I do fine.  But other days that are too hot or stupid overwhelm me and I come up with posts like these where I get annoying things off my chest in a belligerent fashion.  I've also had a good cry or two in the past few days.

- I moved over a year ago and somehow in the move, lost a Dexter netflix disc so we have been unable to cancel netflix since.  Ok, haven't really tried, but in my mind I was going to have to find Dexter and send him back before they'd let me cancel without charging me gazillions of dollars.  Today I came into my office and lo and behold, the disk is just sitting here.  Hubs must have found it and now I can send it back and finally cancel that shit.

- I realize this post is getting long and out of control.  I'll be back tomorrow.  (Spell check time.)