Is it possible for your intestines to get stuck to your uterus and therefore compressed? I swear this is happening to me. It's like they're all squished up in there like a pair of pantyhose in a crowded laundry bag. Well a pair of pantyhose filled with poop.
So anyway, I really really really want to poop. But this whole mashed up intestine thing is really not working for me. I keep trying to talk Tiny Dancer into just giving my insides a little massage with her feet to work it all out but she is 1- inside of me and can't hear, 2- a baby so she wouldn't understand anyway and 3- probably not a very great massage therapist yet. Her poop situation is going to be awesome, she doesn't really care about mine.
Each day as I'm waddling around in pelvic discomfort, I also get the good old gut cramps that accompany a non-poopal situation. And the sweats. And the gas. I'm super dooper attractive right now and my husband can't wait to do it to me. Last night, he said, in an effort to turn me on, "Hey! Why don't we go upstairs and do it?" Sarcastically, I replied, "Ohhhh-kay!!" in a most upbeat fashion, feeling that he would get the hint that asking to do it is actually, very UN-sexy. Apparently, he did not get this as he promptly turned off the tv and headed upstairs. Once I got there, I did my usual night routine, wash face, brush teeth, whine a little, etc. After I got done not pooping, I got in bed. Hubs rubbed my belly a little which caused me to fart a little. (34 weeks folks, 34 weeks.) He looked at me in disgust and then rolled over and went to sleep.
have you tried prune juice? It's disgusting but it's the only thing that helped me when I was preggo.
ReplyDeleteGod loves miralax. And so do I.
ReplyDeleteOk, I'm an awesome pooper, even when pregnant (sorry!), but I really, really, really appreciate and love that you discuss all the things that i am embarrassed to talk about. it gives me courage! so thank you!
ReplyDeleteand good luck with the pooping. that sounds AWFUL. at least you're funny about it!
haha....That's HILARIOUS. I mean, sorry for your impacted rear end, but the fact that you ripped one while your hubby was all into you just makes me snort-laugh. I drank a strong cup of coffee recently to help move things along myself and it worked like a champ. I was desperate.
ReplyDeleteHa, this is awesome. And kind of awesome that your hubby thought he was going to get some for real :).
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